Today’s post will include 5 main pointers on how to be an ideal wedding guest, from Gifts to Thank You’s. The days of extremely formal invitations with clearly delineated guidelines are over. You could get a postcard or even an Evite (hopefully not, but you never know). As soon as you RSVP, you’ve accepted your role as guest to your friend’s wedding. And while it’s easy to treat a wedding like any other party you would attend, it’s actually a bit more complicated due to how high emotions tend to run and the amount of money spent per guest is much great than your average party. Below are a few ground rules to help you navigate the dos and don’ts of being a good wedding guest.
Seriously, don’t assume you have a plus one unless the invitation specifically says “and guest” or the bride/groom have told you that you can bring your significant other. Typically, a plus one should not be expected unless you’ve been with your boyfriend or girlfriend for a long period of time, you’re engaged/married, or live together. Try to remember that each extra guest costs the bride and groom extra, and don’t forget, the singles’ table can be fun too!
Ladies, it goes without saying that you should NOT wear white to a wedding. This includes ivory, champagne, off-white, and even blush, considering the colour palette of wedding gowns these days. As far as rules for attire beyond that, dress appropriately for the time and season. For example, a sundress is great for an afternoon wedding in the spring. In general, anything after 7 or 8 p.m. is considered black tie. As always, if you’re unsure about attire, ask a bridesmaid or family member of the bride.
I can emphasise how important it is that guests RSVP, it may seem like such a minor detail, but let me assure you that no bride feels that RSVP’s are a minor detail! As soon as you receive a formal invitation, respond yes or no––either way! No one will be offended if you can’t attend. Couples need to give vendors head counts, and it’s just rude not to respond. You must confirm to the couple no less than a month before the wedding.
You don’t have to spend a lot of money on a gift for the couple. If they’ve invited you, it’s because they want you to share this special occasion, not because they want to accrue more stuff. Most couples provide plenty of gift ideas at many different price points on their registry. Make sure you ask the bride or close family member if the couple have a wedding registry.
This could be categorized under “Guests,” but I felt that kids needed their own listing. Basically, don’t assume that all four of your kids are welcome at a wedding ceremony or reception. More and more couples are choosing to have adult-only weddings. Even if they aren’t, eliminating kids is a quick and easy way for couples to trim their guest lists. If the invitation isn’t address to you and your family, confirm with a bridesmaid or close family member of the bride.